New Angels & Airwaves album link

click here to download their new album from A&A website for free!

http://modlife.com/angelsandairwaves/love

Think about all of the people who have come in and out of your life. Some stayed only for a moment, some hung around awhile, and hopefully some of them stayed. Think about them. What impact did they have on your life? Did they teach you something? Did they bring happiness into your life? Did they hurt you or disappoint? Now think about yourself – what are those people thinking about you? Did you bring happiness or pain? Did you teach them or did you let them down?

JUST BREATHE – Pearl Jam

Yes, I understand
that every life must end, uh huh
As we sit alone,
I know someday we must go, uh huh
Oh, I’m a lucky man
to count on both hands, the ones I love
Some folks just have one
Yeah, others they got none, uh huh
Stay with me,
Oh, Let’s just breathe

Practiced all my sins,
never gonna let me win, uh huh
Under everything,
just another human being, uh huh
Yeah, I don’t wanna hurt,
There’s so much in this world to make me bleed
Stay with me,
You’re all I see

Did I say that I need you?
Did I say that I want you?
Lord, if I didn’t, I’m a fool, you see
No one knows this more than me
As I come clean I…

Wonder every day,
as I look upon your face, uh huh
Everything you gave,
and nothing you would take, uh huh
Nothing you would take.
Everything you gave.

Did I say that I need you?
Oh, did I say that I want you?
Lord, if I didn’t, I’m a fool, you see
No one knows this more than me
As I come clean I…

Nothing you would take.
Everything you gave.
I hope until I die I…
Meet you on the other side.

Love is letting go of fear

The title of this entry is a quote (Gerald Jamposki) from the book Stand Like Mountain Flow Like Water. As I look back on my life, fear has been my roadblock – fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of standing by my own convictions. I haven’t figured out the root of all of my fear but I’m learning to let go of it.

Faith has taken on a whole new meaning for me. It has freed me from the guilt and fear that kept me from living and loving. I thank God for the people and circumstances that have been placed on my path to guide me.

On Up The Mountain Lyrics

Jakob Dylan

You’re old enough to know well
The better things are all up hill
Bitter songs are never sung
In the highlands where you belong
In the smoke of cannons below
Men they bury each other in rows
People come people go
Work in numbers and leave alone

There’s a light making its way
On up the mountain night and day
You’ll get tired and you’ll get weak
But you won’t abandon your masterpiece

Off to sleep you’ll go
Through the halls and opened doors
Silver bells swinging low
Strung in branches of the unknown
Soon morning comes
To warm the world and wake you up
Night is gone awful fast
It ain’t wrong to be sad

There’s a light making its way
On up the mountain night and day
You’ll go down and you’ll go deep
But you won’t surrender your masterpiece

Here it comes and there it goes
The unbearable sound of the earth making men out of boys
First you learn then you’ll teach
About the bright bright light
Making its way
On up the mountain night and day
You’ll get tired and you’ll get weak
But you won’t abandon your masterpiece

There’s a light making its way
On up the mountain night and day
You’ll go down and you’ll go deep
But you won’t surrender your masterpiece
You will deliver your masterpiece

A leap of faith

ADHD often leaves me feeling unworthy of unconditional love. How can someone possibly love me with all of my quirks and impulses that make life nothing short of chaotic at times. It’s easy to get down on myself and internalize my feelings of inadequacy for fear of being rejected. Unfortunately, I let myself get extremely low and I made some destructive choices. Now, four years later, the one I hurt the most is standing by my side. He’s my dream and the love of my life. I don’t deserve him but he loves me and I love him. He is learning to trust me again and I am learning to fully accept his love. We are both taking our own leap of faith into a relationship that is broken but I know we are on our way to something beautiful.

Listening To Each Other

The topic in my Business Communications class is listening. I found this devotional about listening online:

Delve Into Jesus : Devotionals : Listening To Each Other.

Listening

One of the biggest challenges in my ADHD world is listening. I have horrible listening skills. I often interrupt and my mind is wandering while you are talking. I’m usually thinking about what I’m going to say when you finish…if I even let you finish. I hate that about me. You probably think that I don’t care what you have to say. I do. I want to listen. Be patient with me. I am working on it.

Elf Yourself

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

Borrowing some words tonight

“It’s been long December and there’s reason to believe maybe this year will be better than the last.”

A Long December – Counting Crows

“I remember the truth, a warm December with you…”

Winter – Joshua Radin

And you asked me what I want this year
and I try to make this kind and clear
just a chance that maybe we’ll find better days
’cause I don’t need boxes wrapped in strings
and designer love and empty things
just a chance that maybe we’ll find better days

So take these words and sing out loud
’cause everyone is forgiven now
’cause tonight’s the night the world begins again

I need some place simple where we could live
and something only you can give
and that’s faith and trust and peace while we’re alive
and the one poor child who saved this world
and there’s ten million more who probably could
if we all just stopped and said a prayer for them

So take these words and sing out loud
’cause everyone is forgiven now
’cause tonight’s the night the world begins again

I wish everyone was loved tonight
and somehow stop this endless fight
just a chance that maybe we’ll find better days

Better Days – Goo Goo Dolls

Focalin update

I’ve been on 15mg of Focalin XR since September and it’s been amazing. No side effects and I’m adjusting well to the slight “drop-off” at night when it starts to wear off. My focus has improved and a couple of close friends said I seemed calmer. I think this is the one!  Woohoo!

Because I shouldn’t have to pay to run!

I RUN FOR TURKEY (and PIE) 4 Miler